Monday, November 18, 2013

Solitude


Inside myself is a place where I live all alone, and that's where I renew my springs that never dry up. 

 Pearl Buck

The lake is quiet today. No fishermen roaring or trolling by. No jet skis. No pontoons coming too close to the dock. I don't have to wave or talk to anyone. I sit on the porch and notice the leaves on the trees across the lake are changing. The greens becoming brilliant yellow and orange and red. 

Yesterday my husband and my oldest son jumped into the lake. A last swim as after a week where we saw freezing temperatures, a fine weekend in the 80's had blessed us. We always base  water temps on Green Lake in Minnesota, a spring-fed lake that more often than not took quite a bit of bravery to enter. You either went for it and dove in anticipating a heart attack  or walked in inch by torturous inch until when finally under water that accomplishment overshadowed the cool.



Hillbilly Shower
 It was agreed between husband and son that the November water in our Texas lake was indeed colder than Green Lake in July. So pleased they settled that for me and I did not have to share their bravery. Nor did my granddog as we two watched from the dock.  And a walk this morning with my ears and eyes aware of my surroundings garnered more proof that indeed, fall has arrived. 

My walk didn't only make me aware of the time of year, however. It provided an opportunity to recharge. You see, in reality, I'm shy. I'm an introvert. Might come as a surprise to some of my friends - those that see me telling stories and totally relaxed in their presence. Those that know I open my home and have tons of guests and family visiting often. 

It doesn't bother me to stand in front of a classroom of middle schoolers, but in real life I seek the back row.  I hate when it is my turn to talk when going around the circle. I cringe when I have to make a phone call to someone I don't know. And entertaining? I find it easier to hide when I'm the host - much more difficult to be the guest. 

I'm hiding out at the lake today, a Monday, as last week was my social week. I had Bunco, Book Club, dinner with kids and friends. Great fun, but it wears me out. All that stimulation. All that conversation. I love my friends and family, but I'm used to hanging out in my head and even though I might do that too often, I find comfort there. 

I believe a day like today makes me a better person. The solitude refills my coffers, as they say. The solitude makes me laugh and cry and participate in life the rest of the time. 

Come walk with me. We don't have to talk. Let's just look.


















 My book club recently read a great book entitled Quiet - The Power of Introverts in a World That Can't Stop Talking by Susan Cain. Most interesting. The best explanation I've had of myself in a long time.




15 comments:

  1. A little intense here to swim. I like to always take a May 1st swim, a passage from my childhood.

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  2. Green Lake even in July was always a challenge, but good times anyway. Can't wait to hangout with you guys over Christmas. Going to be a fun time for sure!

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  3. I have the same reaction after a social event; I love to get together with friends and family, but after the event, I'm spent, and for days I want to do nothing more than sleep.

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  4. Lovely, quiet scenes. Thank you.

    If we had jumped into our lake earlier this week, the sound we'd have heard would have been "crack-splash." We were already frozen over for a few days. It's liquid once again but it won't be long now. Nice that your guys got a last hurrah out of November.

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  5. How extremely interesting to think about being more comfortable as host than as guest. That had never occurred to me before, but I feel the same way. I rather have to steel myself to be a guest somewhere but look forward to hosting. Hmmm.

    Send your boys back up here, and I'll toss 'em in Lake Superior. That'll teach them what cold feels like.

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  6. I'm getting more and more introverted as I get older. I still LIKE people, but I like being alone a lot, too. I should read that book you recommend.

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  7. Awesome post! I can relate...social exchanges wear me out and I love getting back to "my" world.

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  8. So happy to hear others like their alone time as well. Always helps to make certain one is okay.

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  9. As you know, this speaks to me. I so enjoyed going on the solitude walk with you. From one introvert to another ... I get it.

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  10. I so enjoyed strolling with you, enjoying the nuances of each scene and paragraph you shared. It fascinates me how introverts can be so social. I always come out in tests as an extrovert but I too think "All that stimulation. All that conversation" and treasure solitude above all else.

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  11. such a lovely walk...your photos are wonderful.

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  12. Nice post sis. I have started to unbury my hymn and liturgy work that I put aside 2 years ago. Moving on. Feeling better. Love to you. Jimmy

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  13. It was great to "take a walk" with you. For once I kept my yap shut and took in the sights!
    Non refundable

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  14. Nice! This was my first walk with you, but it won't be my last. :-)

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  15. I went from one thought to the next while reading this! First, I wondered if that shampoo on the dock was the same brand that I use - Garnier Fructis. I tend to notice the most insigficant things! :)

    I also related to the need for solitude, though like you, I love socializing at book club, lunch with the girls, etc. And add blogging to that.

    But those quiet walks with my dog are a necessary food. The pictures you took are ones that I would have taken, too.

    And then you ended with a book that reallly caught my attention. I'll have to Google it.

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