No other man-made device since the shields and lances of the ancient knights fulfills a man's ego like an automobile.
Sir William Rootes
My husband is buying a new car today. Not really a "new" car. A 2006 model with 35,000 miles, but new to us. He's driven to Houston to pick it up and will arrive home, elated. Proud of his research and purchase. Thrilled, yet perhaps a little hopeful that one of his sons will be around to share his joy, rather than me.Not because I didn't want him to get it (his car was ten years old and had 172,000 miles on it), but because cars just don't do much for me. As long as they start, have super cold air conditioning to accommodate hot flashes, and a radio, I'm happy.
Last week, when Bob emailed me the scoop on the car, I wasn't the most enthusiastic. "Do you really like that color of blue?" I wrote back. And then, "How you going to pay for it?"
Reality. Always a killjoy.
Back to cars. Combine my dad, three brothers, three sons, and a husband, I can't tell you how many hours I've spent driving through car lots in my life. (No wonder I learned to read and ride.) Despite that indoctrination, the men in my family don't understand my conceptual disregard for the meaning of a car.
I have to be honest. I don't think I'd understand even if I had a penis. Perhaps that's why my husband eyes my car with disdain and mutters, "Don't ever wash your car. You wouldn't want it to look good."
It's silver. Hides the dirt. Hauls all my crap. Besides, if I was going to clean something, I'd clean my house.
But, being the good wife that I am, in two hours time I'll put on a good face. I'll act excited for him when he drives into the garage. I'll walk around it and ooh and aha and gush. "Oh, so nice, Bob."
Wish me luck. I'm such a crappy liar.
My Dream Car
You and I are two peas in a pod, on this issue. I try to act interested, but it is truly hard. My husband daydreams all the time about his "next car." I care so much, I gave mine to my son-in-law!
ReplyDeleteI like a clean car, outside, but the inside is cluttered. I'd rather drive an older car with no payments...I HATE car payments!
ReplyDeleteI'm so not a car person either. As long as it works and so does its air con (it is hot over here 12 months a year).
ReplyDeleteBut you are a good sport to put on your game face.
DH (Deer Hunter) goes to the car lots so often, I could send his mail there and he'd get it within a few days.
ReplyDeleteWant me to get excited about something with a motor? Give me that two-door sedan in your photo! Wow!
I hear ya. Although I am grateful for his research. I got a new car two years ago after driving mine for 13 years. I honestly miss it because I abhor car payments. I have to say the seat warmers are nice, though.
ReplyDeleteWhat about car shows. I once went to one with him on a double date after we were married. I was so bored.
You are so funny, and I am sure you will pull off your pleasure with ease.....as long as my car gets me from point A to point B I am happy, yeah I do think it's a man thing. Good Luck and let us know how you make out....:-) Hugs
ReplyDeleteI just want transport-any transport. Cars are way too expensive; by the time they are all paid for, they need to be replaced. Bah, humbug.
ReplyDeleteNope I'm not a car person, either. As long as it gets me from point A to point B & is reasonable with gas mileage, I'm fine. I truly believe that all this fussing under hoods and such is a y-chromosome thing...
ReplyDeleteThere are some carss that excite. I shall never forget the little yellow VW bug that I bought in Denver. It was the first car that I bought on the spot all by myself. Grandpa's old car had just about killed me going through an intersection because the brakes wouldn't work and I turned around and went into the the VW car place and bought this car from a very sexy good-looking salesman.
ReplyDeleteI also almost cried when I had to give up my Pontiac Parisienne a few years back. It had been so reliable and I felt it was disloyal to trade it in even if it had l140,000 miles on it.
I don't think I have the y chromozone!
I can't drive!! But I love to ride in a SUV or CRV!!
ReplyDeleteI just saw this car a day or two ago at a classic car place and told Garrett "there's my car!". And it, too, was blue!
ReplyDeleteI'm the same way about cars. I keep telling David that I get points for putting gas in by myself (because that's all I do). That's all I need to do, because he's supposed to be in charge of everything else car related unless I become widowed.
I know your hubby will appreciate your show of interest - even if he does know that you're embellishing your excitement!
I hear you sister!!! So not a car person - as long as I can get from A to B - I'm a happy girl and oh yes the AC is a must - hot flashes are not my friend either.
ReplyDeleteLove to you.
Kelly
http://www.ivebecomemymother.com
I have loved several of our cars in the past but i'm not a car person. I'm more about picking hte colour and features like power windows and locks. I don't know where the oil goes and i don't want to! :P
ReplyDeleteI loved the line about how your husband did his research.
ReplyDeleteSo familiar. . .
Wow, true confessions: I don't care about cars either. I would just be happy riding a bicycle to work if that were feasible in the NE US.
ReplyDeleteOoo there must be something wrong with me, I absolutely adore my car. I love the feel of it, the smell of it, and the freedom it gives me. Is there a cure?
ReplyDeleteI can so relate to this. But happy hubbies are a good thing, so a little creative enthusiasm is okay in my book. Great story!
ReplyDeleteI'm sort of stuck in the middle here. I do like cars. I hate buying them. I think buying a house is simpler but then I'm a realtor.
ReplyDeleteAs I said, I do like cars. Enjoy getting a new one because I usually get bored with my car in 2 years. Not that I replace it that frequently. But I'm with you on the cleaning. A new car quickly just becomes a tool to me and I seldom notice it needs a bath.
Oh, you are so funny!!! This is a very witty and authentic post!! I thoroughly loved it, and will now have to take up your standard, and put on a "game face." Have a great weekend! Hope you were able to pull it off!! ~Janine XO
ReplyDeleteI like your dream car.
ReplyDeleteI share your disdain for cars.
I'm a car idjit. Whenever there's a reason to remember the type of car...criminal incident or idiot driver or what have you, I might, MIGHT remember the colour and if it was a car or a truck. That's it. Nope. Not even a penis would save me either.
xo
erin
Cars? I remember the tennis racket...things have not changed in how many years?
ReplyDeleteI'm with Valerie, I love my little midlife crisis convertible! I was very careful to buy a 3 year old car (they depreciate the most in the first 3 years, so your husband made a wise investment in that respect) from an older couple who drove very carefully with mostly highway miles and kept it garaged.
ReplyDeleteI used to have a Bob! He liked cars too.... more than me!!! Grrrrrr
ReplyDeleteI suppose congratulations are in order for Bob. Is the engine is a 450 or a 720 with a flex capacitator? Just wondering...
ReplyDeleteEnjoyed the shots of the garden in the last entry.
I feel exactly the same way. My last car was a mini van that I drove for 13 years! I would still be driving it if it didn't start costing me so much money in repairs. I was excited about my new car - a mini cooper - I had been wanting one for four years. But now that I've had it for almost 2 years, it's just a mode of transportation. And I never clean it, either.
ReplyDeleteMy husband just bought a new car and he hardly drives it. I don't get it. We have a third vehicle and he drives it mostly. When will he pull the new car out of the garage and make it worthwhile? I haven't driven it yet. I think I'm I'm supposed to be more excited. Maybe I'll drive it this week. :)
ReplyDeleteHi, I'm back, this time with an award. Pick it up whenever you have time.
ReplyDeletehttp://thirdstoreywindow.blogspot.com
LOL Men just get soooooo much more excited about these things. I just find the purchase of a new car to be a frustrating hassle!
ReplyDeleteStopping by via ds today. Enjoying your funny tales. As for cars, when I was a teen and in desperate want of one I took great care of them to prove I was deserving. That didn't work however since I was prone to crashing them into things.
ReplyDeleteWhen I went to look to buy my first new one, I asked my mom for some help since she should have been a lawyer and can wrangle with the best of them. She told me I was old enough to figure it out for myself and shut me out in the cold. I thought she was just trying to teach me a lesson in independence but now I realize she had probably just had enough of car dealerships - my father swaps his out every two years ;0)
LOL...good luck faking it!
ReplyDeleteI am sure you put on a brilliant act when the time came - is there a woman anywhere who is really interested in cars?
ReplyDeleteI'm totally with ya, sistah. Married to a complete auto buff. I've had to do this "ouu and ah" song and dance for 26 years. Do your duty.
ReplyDeleteYou are the Good Wife. :-) Again, I think we might be the same person.
ReplyDeleteHi Julie
ReplyDeleteyou are a woman after my own heart. My husband collects Mopars - big muscley sort of cars...very early on we came to an agreement - He was free to collect these toys...I however was free to never ride in them...
And I do a pretty good job of pretending the occasional interest...just enough to keep him happy...
Happy days
Maybe have a couple of cocktails and then apply the resultant enthusiasm to his car purchase?
ReplyDeleteI dunno. I pretty much married a woman when it comes to cars. My husband wants us to get down to zero of them.
HAHAHA! Cars don't do that much for me either...unless it's a fire engine-red porsche with a whale tale!...oop, I mean, cars do nothing at all for me! Personally, I'd be pleased as punch if everyone rode around in a rusty, hatched back Honda.
ReplyDeleteOop, that should have been whale TAIL not TALE. See how excited I get over red porsches with whale tails? *grin* We're talkin' vintage porsche, of course!
ReplyDeleteThe husband has hit upon a brilliant idea - he surfs online for cars and whittles down the number of actual lots we have to visit. Very considerate of him, I should say!
ReplyDeleteYou are too funny!
ReplyDeleteYou had be laughing out loud - Great post - Well the return has now come and gone - how did the lying go? Us men need our women to lie to us - especially about our cars and other important things.
ReplyDelete